Bloods are good, time goes by

Writing here stresses me out, yet I *want* to keep updating, hence the sporadic updates. My blood counts are good; I just had a blood test on Monday and my oncologist has decided I'm healthy enough to spread my tests further apart. Instead of seeing him every 4-6 weeks now, I'm not seeing him until August 11th! So I'm on my own for the summer. Good news for sure, but very scary at the same time. It's going to be tough adjusting to the new schedule. While I couldn't be happier than I get to spend less time in the that icky place filled with bad memories, on the other hand, I don't get the constant reassurance that things are going well. Which is something I have to learn how to deal with. And it's really hard. On some level, it feels like the longer it's been since the cancer, the worse I feel when I hear about it or think about it. Like, it's harder to hear about cancer-related anything the more times goes by. Does that make any sense? I guess nothing really makes sense with these kinds of things.

My laptop is falling apart, so I'm getting nervous writing in here, in fear that it might crash while I'm in the midst of typing up a post!