It was a bit of a bittersweet visit with my doctor today, as I found out I might need more rounds of chemo than I previously thought. Which means this may be a MUCH tougher summer than I thought it would be, as it'll mean that I'll be constantly in and out of the hospital. Siiiiigh. :/
"You have a very aggressive type of cancer," they reminded me. "If you don't keep having consolidation treatments, you'll relapse."
I know that but I don't like hearing it. Blaaaah.
One of the many things dealing with this fucking cancer has taught me is seriously, TRULY living in the moment. I know we're all told to do that, we're all supposed to do that, but it's so hard to do! But when I get my tiny little bits of "vacation time" because I spend the rest of time either neutropenic and/or in the hospital, and when I have no idea when I'll get a transplant and no clue which direction my health will take, I have no choice but to do exactly that. When you're forced to do something, I guess that's the best way to learn how to do it.
Heh, I'm living the theme/motto of one of my favourite musicals of all time, Rent. "No day but today."
On the plus side, I'm no longer neutropenic. I've got a good two weeks until I'm being readmitted for chemo round #3 (or as I call it, HELL), so I've got a LOT of activities to pack into the next fourteen days or so---while trying to not go TOO crazy so as not to make myself sick either. :P
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